Considering the amount of time we spend on Facebook, it is not surprising that we leave traces of our personality online. Here are some tips and techniques that can be used to judge a person by his Facebook account.
Seven Facebook Thumbrules
1. Any girl who puts up Katrina Kaif’s photo as her own display picture on facebook is no Katrina Kaif!
2. The quality of a person’s social life is directly proportional to the amount of activity on his wall. If you can generate a hundred ‘likes’ by simply posting a smiley, you’re a rock star. If you need witty quotes and hilarious videos to generate the ‘likes’ you’re still doing fine. If you posted a picture with your cute little nephew/niece’s or declared “Just skydived out of a plane and landed on the Taj Mahal” and still generated two ‘likes’ and a comment which says “Long time no see” then you really need to start paying people to be your friends!
3. Any change on facebook will be vehemently opposed! There will be communities like “A million members here and facebook will roll back the changes”. People will put up angry status updates. This will continue till the next change when people will suddenly pretend to love the old change. By now every feature of facebook has been opposed. It is now a collection of things we once detested! Facebook developers are currently working read hard to come up with the next despicable thing for the world!
4. If Malcolm Gladwell’s ‘Tipping Point’ is to be believed, an average person knows about 150 people. This is about the number of people he/she can have a strong social relationship with. Therefore subtract 150 from the number of friends a person has on facebook to come up with a factor called “Fake Friend Factor”. FFF gives you a good idea of how pretentious/diplomatic a person is. Upto 500 FFF is a reasonably fake person. If you have an FFF of over 2000, you’re probably an actor. Beware of people with FFF greater than 700. They could be con artists!
5. Being tagged in photos is a great joy. However 2 out of 3 photos you are tagged in would be a part of an application such as “My sweetest cuddliest friends” or “BiRtHdAy CaLeNdAr!” or “Winnie the Pooh’s Coochi coos!” or a B school event poster that one of your friends is trying to promote.
6. Six out of 10 people are incapable of spotting a spam link even if the link says “Go ahead, click on it, this is not a virus, this is a very good link which will transform your PC into a mixer-grinder!”
7. Nine out of 10 status updates on facebook are reposted. “Repost this if you have the best dog in the world!”. “Repost this if you are computer literate enough to repost”. Recycled jokes from Chuck Norris to Rajnikant to Anna Hazare, from Bill Clinton to Tiger Woods, from George Bush to Sonia Gandhi. Old and clichéd sayings (Light travels faster than sound that why people appear brighter blah blah blah yawn!). Super emotional (almost gay) verses about friendship and love. Therefore please repost the link to this blog to continue the glorious facebook tradition!
